Friday 26 June 2009

Michael Jackson Was Always Good To Me

Elvis used to get his chimp Scatter stoned and encouraged it to act real nasty, looking up women’s skirts and wrestling with a midget stripper in acts of simulated sex – then he abandoned it to die of madness and neglect. Some even say the lonely animal slowly drank itself to death locked in a cage back in Memphis.

Michael turned Bubbles into a star: he dressed in Osh Kosh dungarees and sat him at his side for a ride through the Tunnel of Love. As soon as Bubbles learns how to sing, he’s going to tour Japan on his own. The whereabouts of Scatter’s grave, however, are unknown at this time. Unlike Bubbles, Scatter really understood the price of fame. He really lived it.

From the essay ‘Electronically Yours, Eternally Elvis’, published in the anthology The Last Sex edited by Arthur and Marilouise Kroker


Rev. Alex Cline said...

Could I somehow get a copy of this essay? I remember reading it years ago and I'd love to give it another once-over in light of recent events and all. Easily the best part of that collection.

Ken Hollings said...

Thanks for getting in touch - if you email me directly through the address on my blog I can send you a PDF of the piece. I should also think about posting an addendeum to the original - we should now add, for example, their fatal fondness for painkillers - good to hear from you.

highway said...

you should have a gander at a book called "me cheeta" if you haven't. faux memoirs of johnny weismuller's sidekick from the old tarzan movies.

his fondness, evidently, was for liquor and cocaine but other than that the similarities are uncanny.

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